Dwight Fee World War One Correspondence Collection, Center for American War Letters, Chapman University, Orange, CA.

September 8th, 1918

Dear Dwight:¹

I am just bubbling over with chatter but there is one thing first that I want to impress on your mind. It is very seldom that I ask a favor of you but I am asking it now and in your next letter, I want you to give me the assurance that you will grant it. UNDER NO CONDITIONS DO I WANT YOU TO GO TO ENGLAND. Since you are in the service, I am very much relieved that you are in France and not in this Country planning to go. And you probably know the Germans are getting desperate and the Officials at Washington are preparing the people for the loss of perhaps a few transports. They have tried to get a few lately but up to this time have been unsuccessful. They say more lives have been lost on the English Channel than anywhere else on the Ocean. Now, please, Sweetheart, promise that you will not go to England if you do get a leave. Go to some quiet American resting place, and spend your time writing to us. There is no attraction for you in England, that I know of, and if there is, you and I shall make a trip after the War and see it together. You know you and I have the feeling that every thing will go right if you do what is right but I do not feel that going to England would be doing right. I would send you the money in a minute but we can spend that money going to Atlantic City TOGETHER. Besides, think how lonesome you would be going by yourself. You will not go, will you? . . .

You ask me to give you a financial report every three months. I gave you one in one of my letters not long ago. So far as it seems the war will last for a good while yet, I am planning to have enough money to buy three things, a lot, a Ford automobile, and furniture. Then you are going to get a job at least for $300.00 a month and perhaps $500.00 a month and then YOU are going to pay for the house. See? I shall start the ball rolling and then you will keep it rolling. In case anything should happen that you would be wounded and sent home, the money will just be spent on you to make you comfortable and I shall keep on working. I see the ban is going to be removed on wives going to France but I am undecided if I care to go. It would be terrible for me to be over in France, if you would be brought back to America. I guess I shall stay at home and “keep the home fires burning” for you, and remember, we do not know what is in store for us but I shall always be here to help you makes no difference what happens. I hope you never need this assurance but remember it in case you do.

I shall buy [four] $50.00 Liberty Bonds and make a payment of $50.00 a month on them during October, November, December, and January. I always get paid after my work is done, so that is the plan I am going to use in my Liberty Bonds and the money will give the Government just as much good. In this way I shall not be hampered in case I need my money for anything. I would not dispose of them for anything but sickness but in case we should get sick I would not hesitate. If I should get sick, I would let Mr. Ginter know immediately but HEALTH is our greatest asset and so far we are all O.K.

In October is the Liberty Loan drive, in November the Y.M.C.A., in January the Red Cross, in February the Knights of Columbus, in March another Liberty Loan so you can see the work I have at the office during these drives. When I said I was busy all the time and not busy at the office I perhaps meant with other things. For instance, every noon I have some little thing to do and when I go home, if I am not going out, I have loads of things to do, for example washing out some things and getting ready for the next day. I have to be neat and clean and it requires a good bit of time. . . .

Are you doing everything according to my wishes? You are not drinking anything but tea are you? You know how I feel on this subject and I am getting stronger all the time. I would not take a drink of anything if I was dying. I do have to confess, though, that I am getting a habit, it is not an awful habit but I am getting it awfully. (Now how about that for a play on words.) It is the CHOCOLATE MILK SHAKE HABIT. I guess I like them so well because you got me the first one, and I have never yet bought one that I did not think of that night in Richmond. . . .

Please do not ask me to keep a carbon of my letters. I am afraid I might say something cross to you sometimes and then If [sic] I remember it when I read over the letters, it would make me miserable. If ever I scold you for anything that you do not NEED scolding for just remember, dear, that I was “tired, hungry, or overworked.” You certainly are the dearest boy in the world to be so considerate. There is no one like you. The more I think of you the more I love you. My feeling for you reminds me of what a foreigner said, when another foreigner had given them a patriotic address and an American asked him what the foreigner had said. “I cannot tell you. It hurts me so around my heart.” Another one said that it tickled his heart.

Things at the office are going in a very unsatisfactory way, especially when I realize the field we have for good. It is so poorly managed and it is simply a case, perhaps not of politics but favoritism. By the way, do not mention anything of this or let any one see this part of the letter, because this is purely confidential. Mr. Stevenson is Chairman and whenever possible he works his friends in and in most cases they are most incompetent, regardless of whether they have made good in other lines.

Mr. C. S. Crawford is said to be a very good attorney but personally, If [sic] I wanted to be sure to lose a case, I should employ him. He is Chairman of the Speakers Bureau. He gets the credit and I do the work. Mr. Stevenson comes into me and says “Mrs. Fee, here is a notice of a meeting. Kindly see that Mr. Crawford gets some one to speak.” Now as a matter of fact Mr. Crawford never knows about that meeting until the speaker has been assigned. Then he takes a record of it. This week I have been overwhelmed with work and never have asked Mr. Crawford for one bit of assistance, because sometimes when I have, he bawls things up so and beats around the bush so much that I am nearly driven crazy, so I arrange everything without him. He has absolutely no idea the directions for any meetings [n]or does he know what men are especially fitted for a certain occasion. I keep track of them all in my head from their vacations and previous engagements down to their telephone [numbers]. Sometimes when Mr. Crawford gets extremely interested in a place he will try to arrange a meeting but he gets in so many complications he is glad to turn it over to me. Now, I love the work and it is the only work that I have ever done where I felt that I was worth real money. The thing that gets me is that I do all the work for $90.00 a month (beginning Sept 1st) and on Sunday a big piece comes out in the papers, like the one I am enclosing, where “Chairman Crawford arranged the following meetings.” Now, Gibb Marsh writes the stories but he has to do it to keep on the good side of them to do it.

Their maximum is $90.00 a month for Stenographers. But sometime when I have arranged about one hundred meetings, because the work is just starting now, I am going to ask for more because I am not a stenographer. Now, I am not a stenographer. I never get any dictation in connection with the Speakers Bureau, as I write all my own letters. Everything that Mr. Crawford does, I suggest it first. The speakers were never paid until I suggested it for Mr. Crawford. Then he said “well, fix up the accounts, and get everything ready and I shall sign the receipt for the money.” Well, I did and he paid them through his bank. The very next morning, he said “Mrs. Fee, this thing of bothering with the speakers expense is getting to be a nuisance, so after this you take care of it and pay them personally.” Now I have to keep the accounts and pay them personally. Now, for the good of the Bureau this is a fine idea, because in this way, men are too busy to come to my office can be reached and we can talk things over for the good of the Bureau. The only thing I am complaining about is that Crawford gets all the credit. . . .

However I feel that I am doing a great deal of good and shall stay just as long as I can put up with it. Credit does not amount to anything anyway and I suppose I can stand to let Mr. Crawford get the credit, poor soul, if it does his soul any good. May he rest in peace.

Now, precious boy, you shall have to take a day off to read this letter but it seems that I have been talking to you ever since I started this letter. I haven’t really told you anything at all. I am still on the job and I try to do things ALL the time that I know will please you.

Remember I love you more every day and am praying for God to bring you home safe to me or rather to us, because I must not be selfish and say I.

Forever and ever,
Yours only,
Lucille

December 2nd, 1918

Dear Dwight:

I promised to write to you every day and I am so far keeping my promise, even if I am staying overtime to do it.

This letter may be a bit confusing but if so, you will know that it is just because I have been terribly busy and have hardly had time to breathe. If this keeps up, I shall surely be kept busy and I only hope that you will be kept busy too, so that the time will pass quickly.

I guess I told you about Mr. Scott coming from Washington. He is from the Federal Board for Vocational Education in regard to disabled soldiers. I always like the work of the Speaker’s Bureau but I like this ten times better, although you have to work like sin. I have worked three days on it so far. I told you I got my week’s notice from the Council of National Defense, but Mr. Scott told me today that he would take care of the rest of the month, in case I cared to work on. I shall do so unless I am compelled to file my claim that I am dependent upon you, but really I hope that it will not be necessary, because I feel that I am really doing some good in the world by working for these soldiers. However, unless things turn for the worst, I do not plan on working after January first, but I want to work this month.

This morning I was sent up to the Civilian Relief of the Red Cross to transcribe some data for Mr. Scott and I got to talking to one of the women up there. She told me all about the course they were going to conduct beginning January for people who wanted to take up welfare work, lasting six weeks. I think I should love to do this and I know you would like me to do something like this, but your working at night would interfere with my working at day time. I know my first duty is to you and you come first in all my thoughts but I wish I could keep house, work, and be a good faithful wife all at the same time. However, I know this is impossible but somehow I wish I were strong enough to do this. If Ma and Pa lived in Pittsburgh, I believe for a year at least that we would both work and have Ma keep house for us. Now, you can see how frequently I change my mind that I am not at all worthy of you, because I am always wanting to do something different. You know how it was out at Becker’s when I was trying to do the housework and go to school. I was always in a bad humor and nothing was ever done right. That is what is wrong at Canonsburg, Ma has too many jobs. Why does a woman have ambitions? I would like to be about ten things at once. Kindly figure out and let me know how some women are Mothers, business women, housekeepers, etc. all at the same time. I never have seen them but I often read of them. They usually have a divorce somewhere in the family, and you know there is nothing like that in our family.

I shall continue to work constantly for your discharge. Above all file your application. After January 1st, I am yours for the asking for all time. Rush your Christmas list.

Write often and thanks a thousand times for that lovely Thanksgiving letter. It was beautiful. I did not find time to write you that day but do not think I did not give thanks.

Must close, as it far past my dinner time.

Love,
Yours & yours only,
Lucille